Are you looking for ways your partner can help with breastfeeding? Breastfeeding can be isolating and feel overwhelming. Here are some ways you can be supported.
I’ve seen it 1000 times in the mom groups – “I wake up in the middle of the night to breastfeed and I stare at my husband and his useless nipples.” Moms complain that their husband can’t help them because they are the food source. This is also a common reason I’ve seen moms give up breastfeeding because they feel like it’s all on them. Or they end up pumping and giving a bottle too early and it ends their breastfeeding journey.
Just because you are the main food source does not mean no one can help you. There are plenty of ways to get your partner on board with helping with breastfeeding without actually feeding the baby.
Let me be clear – there is nothing wrong with giving a baby a bottle. But please understand that giving a bottle too early (typically 6 weeks) can really mess with your supply and create a bottle preference for baby.
Ways a Partner can Help With Breastfeeding
Educate
Everyone who plans to breastfeed should take a breastfeeding course, but bringing your support person with you is even better. This way, you both are on the same page and you know how breastfeeding works and can help problem solve, should problems arrise.
Bottle feed (at 6-8 weeks)
When the time is right, your partner can help with bottle feeding. It’s important for you and your partner to research paced bottle feeding and it’s important to wait until at least 6 weeks old, when your supply and breastfeeding relationship is established.
Refill water
Hydration is important in general and when breastfeeding, you will likely feel more thirsty than normal. Your partner can make period checks on your water supply and make sure that water cup is full! One of my favorite water cups is the simple modern brand. (affiliate link)
Take over chores
As moms, we have a lot of responsibility on our shoulders. Give your partner a list of things that are nagging you and need to be done so you can focus on breastfeeding your baby and building that bond together.
Entertain siblings/visitors
Big siblings also have lots of feelings going on when a new baby enters the world. They can become super clingy to mom, especially during feeding times. Your partner can take over the parenting for the big sibling. Take him/her out for ice cream, library trips, etc. Your partner can also help with entertaining visitors if you want to step away to breastfeed or take a nap.
Take baby for walks/car rides
Breastfeeding can be overwhelming. Sometimes you may need a break. Have your partner take the baby out for a walk or car ride while you take a rest or a shower.
Get up with baby
When baby wakes up to feed, have your partner get the baby for you, change baby’s diaper and give you baby. After you’re done feeding, they can burp your baby and put baby back to bed. You don’t even have to get out of bed!
Support breastfeeding
Talk about your breastfeeding goals with your partner before baby comes so your partner can appropriately support you.
Burp baby
When you’re done feeding, hand your baby over to your partner so they can burp him/her.
Stock breastfeeding/pumping station
If you have a breastfeeding or pumping station, ask your partner to check it out and see if it needs a restock (keep a checklist nearby). We loved using this cart as a station.
Change diapers
Have your partner change those diapers! You’re working so hard to keep that baby satisfied so ask your partner to do the next most important thing.
Take photos
Breastfeeding is a full-time job and you can feel like it’s all you do. Have your partner take photos of you breastfeeding and bonding with your baby. Candid photos are sometimes the best photos.
The most important thing a partner can do to help with breastfeeding is to be communicative. Communication is important in any relationship and it’s so, so important when a new baby comes along. You’re running on little sleep and it can be rough. Think about what it is you need from them and don’t hesitate to tell them what you need.